Untimely Reviews – 2 Star Movies “The Core”

      The peach, the peach, the peach is on fire!  Continuing my review of 2 star movies is an honest-to-goodness 2 star effort, "The Core".  Everything that needs to be known about this movie can be encapsulated in one scene.  Two scientists, a young messy haired geologist and an older Carl Sagan-like famous geologist,  are explaining the Earth's impending doom to a panel of generals and cabinet members in charge of the United States government.  While telling the room of decision makers about all of the bad things that will happen when the Earth's core stops rotating, the messy haired geologist asks for a peach and an aerosol can.  At the conclusion of his talk, the messy haired geologist asks the Carl Sagan-like geologist to activate his lighter.  He then uses the lighter to ignite the aerosol spray and shoots fire onto the peach.  The peach bursts into flames and the messy haired scientist says "This is the Earth without its magnetic field." 

     I burst out laughing.  Why?  The flaming peach scene reminded me of the "This is you brain on drugs" commercials.  It is also just ridiculous that these two scientists would do this unrehearsed.  Most sad, though, is that the government audience is more persuaded by the flaming peach than the credible explanations.  We the audience are not let in on how exactly the generals and cabinet members reacted, but I imagine it was something like the following:

     "Fred, did you see that, the peach was on fire."
     "Call the President, tell him about the peach."
     "The peach totally blew up, oh my god, I didn't know that peaches were even flammable."
     "Did you see that peach?  We are in deep sh*t".
     "Flaming peaches, run for your lives!"

Did I mention that this was supposed to be a serious movie.

     There is no point in my spoiling the rest of the fun, but I will add that the depiction of death by shrinking room was equally laughable.  For a more scientific review of this movie's factual foibles, check out Insultingly Stupid Movie Physics.  The enjoyment of mockings brings it into 1 star territory, but the eye candy effects and quite good performances shoot this fantasy disaster epic into the 2 star range.  I suggest you do what I did, grab a peach, find it on cable, and don't worry about what you'll miss during bathroom breaks.

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